It’s Eid again, Alhamdulillah! The hashtag this year is #BlackOutEid and this has got me excited! It’s finally time to wear that brand new dress I collected from my tailor last night. That guy almost gave me a heart attack. Sewn to fit, you’d swear it was made on me. Super Wax is N39,000 this year, the tailor did a great job in accentuating my curves.. what a way to bring out it’s worth! SALAFIE GAME ON, SALAFIE GAME STRONG! The 150k I spent to attend makeup school better payoff. I already see myself being crowned slay queen 2017.
Even though my scalp still hurts a bit because I think the hairstylist didn’t wash the relaxer off my hair in time, My hairdo is P-E-N-G (What’s does that spell? PENG!) Gosh! My henna is so flawless, you’d think It’s tattooed. Aaah! I just remembered the I.V to the Sallah barbecue I was invited and I heard everyone is coming and also they’ll be inviting badman binladin.. “you for me!!!”. Can Eid get better?! I heard he’s retired, so I doubt if he’d be coming. It’s been long since my ears listened to music.. 29 days felt like forever. Twitter, Snapchat and Instagram better get ready ’cause they will be rocked this Eid. Oh yeah, whatsapp status!!! I will make sure I get the most likes and retweets. I sense a new fashion statement in the making.
Wait.. it was Ramadan that just passed, right? Darn it! Satan has been released today, no wonder what I didn’t find appealing during the month all of a sudden has my heart. 29 days of worshipping Allah about to come crashing. 29 days of abstinence.. Not just from food, but from going out without the correct hijab, from keeping away from unnecessary intermingling with boys, 29 days of lowering my gaze. I’ve spent twenty nine good days trying to build a Master-Slave relationship with my creator in the best of months. Those tears I shedded in the darkest hours of the night seeking for forgiveness all to waste? I worked so hard to fast and pray hoping for reward from Him perhaps He will forgive me. Am I ready to throw it all away for cheap comments from people? ..to satisfy my wanton desire of feeling good because people say I am beautiful? Am I ready to be oppressed by those girls seemingly winning the slaying game?
I wonder, will Allah be pleased with me if I engage in such? I know, my raging human desire demand that I go out there and have the haram type of fun. But Eid is not a time for us to drop our manners and say it’s just for three days. It’s a time we are to thank Allah for giving us an opportunity to worship Him relentlessly for a month, a time to celebrate and praise Him for giving us an opportunity to redeem ourselves, a time to enjoy from what He has given us from His bounty.
“Many were the generations before you We destroyed when they did wrong..” Q10:V13
How sure am I that I am better than those that did wrong? No, I’d rather take the hurtful remarks that people will throw at me when I go out with the hijab. Yeah I’ll look grotesque, perhaps even revolting. My friends will probably wonder why I didn’t post any salafie this year and even if I do, it will be with my hijab on. If there’s one thing then it’s me being trained better by Ramadan than to seek for human attention. It’s only by His Rahama that I’ve made it out of the month alive. I’m not better than those who lost theirs during the month. It’s too early for me to loosen my Hijab. I’m ashamed to be such an ungrateful slave.
From what I’ve learnt during the month, the grave is dark and scary except for s/he who did well following the commandments of Allah, Jahannam is too hot a fire to bear and death can overtake us any minute. What will I say to Allah when He calls me to account for my deeds on the Day of Judgment? That I wanted to slay that’s why I went about half naked? Well, How about those ladies prettier than me that were strong and choose not to? Did they want to go to Jannah while I choose to pass on that? Men, I’d only be doing myself a favour to hold on tight to what is right for Allah said:
“To those who do right is a good (reward) and more (than in measure)! No darkness nor shame shall cover their faces! They are Companions of the Garden, therein they will abide (forever).” Q10:26
Albeit I am seeking attention, but not here. I’m seeking to be recognised and hailed by my Creator in the midst of angels high up in the Heavens. Eid won’t make me loosen my Hijab because that will defeat the purpose of the celebration. It’s a commandment by Allah for us to wear the Hijab. If we don’t, we are disobeying Him and that will spell doom for us. Jannah is not for the weak, you have to be strong and steadfast in obeying Allah for you to be worthy of a spot. So what if some ladies don’t wear it, you’ll be judged differently. And don’t look down upon them if they don’t wear the Hijab, that might be their only struggle while you are here dealing with a heap of sins.
…this year I’m going to slay wearing my hijab!
Please note: This is fiction. This is often times the situation our dear sisters find themselves in and shy away from the thought of Allah being watchful over them.